I have been saving this post for so long, keeping it in drafts praying I never needed it. I wish I hated you. Things would have been so different. This friendship never would have happened, the darkness never would have won. I try to be strong try to fight it, but I’m done. I quit, the pain is too much. There is a riot in my head. Everything is crumbling. I tried to make it work, tried to forget the past. I thought I could do it, thought I could win, but your smiling is fading, now I wish I was dead. Where did it go wrong? Does it even matter now? It’s too late to change the past. But I will learn. I won’t make this mistake again.