I saw your saddened face as you walked past. You didn’t see me, and I was too afraid to ask. So I went into my classroom. I sat at my desk, and I worried. I thought about every reason why you could possibly look sad. To be honest most of my answers were egotistical. I thought you were sad because of the letter. I couldn’t stop worrying. I valued you. It is due to you that I am getting better or at least trying. I made my choice, and I have the feeling you will be making yours soon.
It is the little things that matter the most. It was the goodnight kiss that helped me sleep that night. Something you figured to be so small and insignificant proved you actually cared. I have found that people often lie with words, but actions are never lied about. The fact that you cared enough about me to give me a goodnight kiss means more to me then any of your words ever will. You saved me that night and I can’t ever thank you enough. Maybe one day you’ll see how important you are to me, but for now I’ll live with the spring breeze that promises summer is soon.
It has been so long since I’ve felt pain like this. I feel lost. I want to be with you, but you’re afraid of being with me. To be honest a dagger to the heart would have felt better than this. I want it to end. This is too much. I just want to be with you, but it doesn’t seem like you want to be with me. I know it’s not true I know you want to be with me, but you are not the only one who over thinks things.
Part of me wishes you would just stop thinking, but it won’t work if you do. I’m torn, part of me wants to wait for you, the other part wants to hate you. You’re worried about things that don’t matter, or about things that won’t happen. I’m scarred. You have all my secrets, if you left now I wouldn’t be able to open up again. You have been so sweet to me. Which just worries me more. No one has been this sweet and stayed long.
All of our hard work finally seemed to pay off. All day long we rushed around getting ready for our next match. When victory came we were the loudest. We screamed like Vikings. No one could stop us. We had overcome all of our obstacles. Victory felt so good.
After everything that had happened, after all the confessions, I’m left to wonder. What are we? Friends? Do you like me? I keep hoping you do, but I always come to the same realization. You don’t like me. To you I’m just a friend. I’m probably not even a good friend, just friend. Someone to talk to, but never grow attached to. I however… I however can’t see you like that. I’ve tried so hard to get you out of my head, but I can’t. When she put on your jacket I felt so numb. When she talked to you I got so jealous. I wanted to be the one talking to you. I hated her for it, but I couldn’t tell anyone. You didn’t want me. I just wish I could say the same.
I don’t know how to thank you. I’ve never been good with ‘thank yous’ mostly due to how I was raised. You deserve one though. I’m not very good at your class, far from it, but instead of being like most teachers you seemed to understand. The help you have given me brings tears to my eyes, and makes me speechless which is quite the impressive feat considering all I do is write. AT the start of the year I dreaded having your class. I’ve just never been good in the subject. Now however I eagerly await for the bell that proudly declares your class has started. I wish I did not lack the words to describe how thankful I am. You are just such a wonderful and amazing teacher. I’m so glad I was lucky enough to have you.